grr! I need to rant.

[Lil Dragonfly]

My mom was mentioning to my therapist that I plan on spending big bucks on freediving gear.

He said, well first you need to try freediving, just to make sure that you like it. You are just a beginner.

I told him that I don't appreciate being called a "beginner" freediver. I devoted 10 years of my life to it!

Then he asked how deep I could go.

I told him that my strengths were static and dynamic, and that I had trouble with depth because I am bad at equalizing. (I'm allergic to dust mites, so I am constantly full of snot.)

I told him that I can only go to 20 feet.

Then he kept saying, "No. You have never been to 20 feet. You must have misjudged the depth."

I told him that whenever I go snorkeling I always ask the boat captain how deep the water is.

He just said, "You? 20 feet? No. Never."

Then he kept going on about how I really was a beginner.

I told him how can I be a beginner? As a kid my freediving skills amazed everyone! (On snorkeling trips everybody on the boat would ask me "How do you do that?". If I sat on the bottom of the pool, people would crowd around mistaking me for dead. And at summer camp the lifeguard, not believing that anyone could possibly hold their breath for so long, thought I was drowning every time I went under, and banned me from the lake.)

He said, well you are a beginner.

:vangry

P.S. He later made a non-apology for his behavior, saying "oh I only said all that to help keep you safe", along with making medically incorrect statements about the injury that now prevents me from swimming competitively. (One minute I have a condition he has never even heard of, the next minute he is the "expert" of it!)

 

[BennyB]

Get a new therapist, if he's that closed minded about freediving, God knows what else he is closed minded about in his diagnosis...

 

[wet]

I've no idea if it would help, but have you heard of saline sinus rinse, for relieving the dust mite allergy? And possibly humming might help too. (or not) Get a free-diving therapist?

 

[JennyWren]

Your therapist sounds like a close-minded jerk. Someone like that isn't going to be able to provide the help that you need. Clearly you are not a beginner.

 

[nz676]

i think anyone that uses the words "devoted 10 years of my life" cannot be called a beginner

 

[Lazuli]

No shame in being a beginner. This sport kills experienced hands, just like BASE jumping . Maybe you need to question why you are so angry at what he said, why his words touched a nerve. In theory I've been holding my breath underwater for fun going on 20 years, but I'm still a beginner and will probably always want to see myself as one as there are always new things to learn.
Why is your mum conferring with YOUR therapist anyhow? Seems odd.

 

[Erik]

Get a new Counsellor. All the pieces of paper on the wall mean nothing if this is how he speaks.

 

[StewartZ]

sounds like a deusch.. screw him! And go buy your gear!

 

[Kars]

I don't know why you're visiting a therapist, but this one sounds rather dumb and demoting. You can counter those moments by asking about his expertise - I guess he'll avoid it. I think you can spend you money better on buying some nice freediving gear, have lot's of relaxing fun with it, and explore your mind in the silence of the deep.

Maybe it's time you take some own initiative, start to go your own way, not asking permission from anyone and bear the accompanying responsibility.

Sounds like you've just met a crossing, seek some solitude to think about it, what do you, YOU, truly, deeply want?

I hope these words are helpful.


Love, Courage and Water,

Kars

 

[DafyddRees]

I think this belongs to the covers of Heat or Hello! magazines. Forgive me for not really seeing any relevance to freediving.

 

[spaghetti]

I agree with Eric that this therapist gotta go.
It sounds like he's challenging you, provoking you to "prove" what you're saying. This is stupid, and dangerous, as it could cause you to push yourself at the edge your capabilities. Don't fall in the trap. Improvements in freediving must be achieved step by step, gradually and responsibly.

Of course you don't have to prove anything to him, nor to anyone else.
You know your own skills and your own limits, don't you?

What I'm trying to say is:
now please don't push yourself beyond your limits just to show to him that you can make it. You don't have to prove or show anything to anyone. Feel comfortable with your self, enjoy and dive safe.

 

[Lazuli]

I think this belongs to the covers of Heat or Hello! magazines. Forgive me for not really seeing any relevance to freediving.

roflroflroflrofl

thread-bare

 

[bluejuiceaddict]

I personally think therapists make you feel like crap to justify paying their wages.Then you have to come back and sort out issues they have created and pay them more money-narrow minded tool.
sounds like they need to be taken freediving for some aqua therapy!
you can always come diving with me?:inlove

 

[JennyWren]

I think this belongs to the covers of Heat or Hello! magazines. Forgive me for not really seeing any relevance to freediving.

Many of us struggle to explain why we dive, and what it means to us, to others who do not. Mixing "dry-life" with "freediving-life" is one of the challenges of being a freediver, and is (at least in part) the subject of Lil' D's post. I think it's entirely suited to this forum.

 

[bluejuiceaddict]

women express their feelings in a different way to men that was just a not knowing how to deal with it response as was probably mine not a very supportive one-men want to find solutions.

i think your therapist prob has issues of their own and you shoudnt be put of pursuing what is essence your way of life your identity and way of relaxation etc the list is endless.
i dont freedive as i havent found a buddy yet but do spearfish.
keep it up persue what you want too, whos names on your bank account! yours or the therapist?!

 

[DafyddRees]

Many of us struggle to explain why we dive, and what it means to us, to others who do not. Mixing "dry-life" with "freediving-life" is one of the challenges of being a freediver, and is (at least in part) the subject of Lil' D's post. I think it's entirely suited to this forum.

Hmm I don't know... I think Lil'D is complaining about a therapist getting involved in something which has nothing to do with them?? Forgive me but I am unbelievably sceptical about "therapists" as I believe there are much more appropiate and beneficial routes to getting around stumbling-blocks in life. I do not see the need for going to a therapist to discuss spending money on a hobby?? - Therefore, odd topic.

If these are the meaty topics you are discussing with your therapist, I would honestly stop seeing them. I think being more assertive about the choices you have would be a much greater help!

(Before flaming, I am not being rude, but it is hard to convey tones on voice in the written word)

 

[rxcnc2]

My mom was mentioning to my therapist that I plan on spending big bucks on freediving gear.

I told him that I don't appreciate being called a "beginner" freediver. I devoted 10 years of my life to it!

I told him that I can only go to 20 feet.

Sorry for being blunt, but
a) how old are you? You have been freediving for 10 years, and you are subject to your mom's supervision so did you start at 8?
b) if after "devoting" 10 years you are going to 20 feet -ok for some infection not for your abilities- technically mr therapist is not wrong in saying you are a beginner.
c) what kind of expensive gear do you need for 20 feet? where are you diving?

I know I should put my foot in my big mouth, but when you write to a forum you should expect all kinds of advice... and mine would be to spend the big bucks on a cure for your nose-ear problems not for gear. Your mother and therapist could not object, you would reach 100 ft, and then nobody could call you a beginner.

 

[Kars]

Oh another point:

Sometimes parents use therapist to push their children into their envisioned for you future. They tried the same thing with me.

So my recommendation stands, do some soul searching, and pick a way that fits you somewhat. I'm not going to say best, because you'll have too high expectations resulting in disappointment. To me every job is like being a whore, with a few nice moments that make it bearable, for a while.
A big number of possibilities people tend to be much less happy with their choice. And than again unhappy people consume more and are easier to manipulate.

 

[Tony Babowicz]

Sorry for being blunt, but
a) how old are you? You have been freediving for 10 years, and you are subject to your mom's supervision so did you start at 8?
b) if after "devoting" 10 years you are going to 20 feet -ok for some infection not for your abilities- technically mr therapist is not wrong in saying you are a beginner.
c) what kind of expensive gear do you need for 20 feet? where are you diving?

I know I should put my foot in my big mouth, but when you write to a forum you should expect all kinds of advice... and mine would be to spend the big bucks on a cure for your nose-ear problems not for gear. Your mother and therapist could not object, you would reach 100 ft, and then nobody could call you a beginner.

Lil,D,
You should invest in a course if you have not already. You live in a prime location, and a group of us get together very often to dive and train. As a matter of fact, there is a monofin session this evening in Pompano beach. It is very helpful for technique for both monofin and bi-fin swimming. Anyone can come, although you must first take the introduction session one time to be able to join in on the practice session. a reallly great bunch of guys and girls show up with all different skill levels. No egos, no one to impress (except yourself) just a good time in the water. You just have to contact Martin or Niki to let them know you intend to show up for the introduction. (If nobody is taking the intro session, then Martin won't be at the pool until the regular session starts.) Send me a PM and I could give you a phone number to call, or get on their website www.freedivinginstructors.com .

 

[samdive]

no harm in being a beginner,

“You can learn new things at any time in your life if you're willing to be a beginner. If you actually learn to like being a beginner, the whole world opens up to you.” - Barbara Sher

“A good man is always a beginner” - Marcus Aurelius

“In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert's mind there are few” - Shunryi Suzuki

The day you start thinking you're an expert, is the day you stop learning. Until we can dive at least as a seal, we're all beginners, no harm in that!