Sven's Caption Contest!!

[Griff]

The Spearo's Motto

"Its not the size your gun that counts...its what you do with it!"



And

The environmentalist couldn't just stand there and watch him slaughter the seagulls. if only there was a way to distract him...

and, at a push.

"damn, where's the rest of my baywatch float?"

 

[Griff]

does anyone know how to get hold of last year's winning entry?

 

[M-2]

shrinkage?

 

[mark aronoff]

Theater poster for sequel to "Deep Blue C".....
Coming to a theater near you "Deep Blue Double-D"

 

[mark aronoff]

Prince Charming knew he only had until midnight to find the owner of the missing garment so he resolutely dashed from beach blanket to beach blanket searching for the matching bottom...and top.

 

[mark aronoff]

Prince Charming knew he only had until midnight to find the owner of the missing garment so he resolutely dashed from beach blanket to beach blanket searching for the matching bottom...and top.

The curator of the wax museum was thoroughly enjoying setting up the Mae West exhibit.

You CAN feel good while feeling blue...

The winning entry in the Clean-Up-The-Beach found object contest.

Angry spearos complained to the editor that the blue rags ruined the "Spear of the Month"centerspread photo.Two picketed the editorial office carrying signs and wearing red Speedos.

 

[M-2]

"Hey Hootie, where are those blowfish?"

 

[Ward2]

It could happen to anyone...

"...Things got REALLY interesting when Sven whipped out his gun, unfortunately it misfired shortly after she whipped out her guns..."


:chatup

 

[icarus pacific]

easy on the Beav, Ward

never happen, Ward. And I have references.:chatup

sven

 

[Ward2]

Ahh, the film doesn't lie Sven...

'I've had many bad days. When the sea doesn't want you...'

'It's never the sea! The swimming pool, my speargun, that braless actress...'



~W2

 

[Octo]

Advertisements:

Thank You Sven!

Voit Speargun: $40.00

Old Dive Watch: $15.00

Blue Satin Bra: $55.00

Matching Panties (not shown): $45.00

Reading the replies to this post: Priceless. (Lynn gets my vote as the funniest so far. Brief, witty and hilarious!!)



My Feeble Attempt...
(use an over-enunciated announcer voice to read the following)

"Introducing the new OCTO Boobie-Blue. Perfect for those hot days when a wet t-shirt just isn't cold enough. Equipped with custom lace, monofilament underwires and our specialized form-fitting cold gel packs will give you elegence, support and comfort you can Only experience with our exclusive products! Perfect for training to cold water dive and spearfish! Wait,there's more...Boobie-Blue also doubles as an expandable cooler! Perfect for chilling three rockfish, two abalone, or one Lingcod! Also an economical and affordable solution to expensive breast reduction surgery. Do not confuse this product with ANY of the other cheap imitations. We hold exclusive patents on the 'Octo Conform' cold packs."

"Buy Now and receive the matching g-string...for Him-Free! Yes, for that special man in your life it's Got To be the OCTO Teste-Blue! Guaranteed to get ANY man prepared to dive North Or South of Latitude 38...AND for those guys who have trouble fitting into small wetsuits: Five minutes with this amazing product and your troubles will be over!! Guaranteed to shrivel anything to the size and feel of three frozen peas in just seconds to help you slip into even the tightest farmer-johns with ease! Teste-Blue ALSO doubles as a cooler and can be used to keep scallops and limpets fresh for days!"

(the following to be spoken in a low, words-run-together disclaimer voice)

"Boobie-Blue and Teste Blue is a registered trademark of Octo Unlimited. No guarantees, exchanges or refunds...ever. Side affects are the same as experienced by those using placebo products and include: shortness of breath, bulging eyes, extended durations of testicular retraction, excrutiatingly constricted areola, and mild to severe frostbite and/or hypothermia. In extreme cases, some permanant retraction of testes and nipples has occurred. Prior to using our products, we strongly recommend you consult your doctor...or somebody...or anybody!"

 

[icarus pacific]

Re: Advertisements:

Originally posted by Octo
(Lynn gets my vote as the funniest so far. Breif, witty and hilarious!!)
QUOTE]

(To be read in a deep, barritone "God-speaking-from the-clouds" tone

Aaron, just come , uh, er, flat out and ask for her number !:inlove

sven

 

[Octo]

Lynn was the funniest to me, and besides, I got little time to date, only time to flirt...you little glootimus mixemup boy you! I will send you a free Teste-Blue to clear up that noisy flopping floffie problem...

Hugs and Kisses,:yack

 

[Vodouch]

Not The "Little" Mermaid any more

 

[icarus pacific]

czech it out!

Nowthat is funny, Vodouch!

sven

 

[Octo]

Following the light at the top of an ocean cave, Sven joyfully surfaces in a warm pool with a gorgeous near-miss...

 

[Jon]

"And some days the sea DOES want you!"

Jon

 

[Lou]

Caption Contest

"Sven realized that there was still alot of work to do on his custom underslung dual catapault gun":duh

 

[Jay Styron]

THE LEDGEND

As the light of day fades and the Sven tribe gathers around the campfire; the story of, "the one that got away" will doubtlessly be passed down from father to son for generations to come. And as the old man gazes into the fire, his eyes become misty with the knowledge of just how close he had been to "collecting" one of natures most majestic and wary creatures. Something very few men and no boys would be capable of.......

 

[Bill]

SVELTE SVEN SURVIVES (barely) another encounter with a 'real' woman.

Aloha
Bill

P,S. That's from a one who had to look up the spelling of alliteration.