Freedivers: Narcisistic Selfish Insidelooking angry people?

[laminar]

Perfect thread for a Wednesday evening after 7 hours in the water. I'm surprised - no sign of fondueset anywhere. Shhh, don't tell him, otherwise this thread will really jump el sharko.

A Haiku inspired by Narcissism

She says we're all gay - (whatever!)
rub my snorkel and see my
reflection in pink.

There are times when I wish we were all on the beach at dusk and carrying this conversation on in real life.

I'd want to see Erik rofl and Sara :friday and Azapa :martial.

And all rest of you as your avatars. Life sized.

 

[Erik]

.

I'd want to see Erik rofl and Sara :friday and Azapa :martial.
.

Inshallah! Make it so. Engage!

 

[island_sands]

There are times when I wish we were all on the beach at dusk and carrying this conversation on in real life.

I'd want to see Erik rofl and Sara :friday and Azapa :martial.

And all rest of you as your avatars. Life sized.

tell ya what, not a bad idea...

here's me with my current life's a beach eh?

 

[island_sands]

Does she serve you the quadruple bi-pass burger while wearing the nurse outfit? Then take off to go shopping while your in a comma?

P.S. What was the topic of this thread? It just crossed into third or fourth topic of other threads I've read and/or posted in! rofl

like this?

 

[Drejcha]

We sure crushed the myth...

It has been proven freedivers ane UNfocused and potent...

 

[podge]

OH wow, and when you get naughty does she smack it with a cold spoon?

The cold spoon would be great but its usually the wire brush and vinegar,:blackeye but even that is still less painful than your leather whip.:chatup:chatup
Uummm burgers, nurse’s, cold spoons and leather whips, it don’t get much better than that.roflroflrofl

 

[BennyB]

And all rest of you as your avatars. Life sized.

You want to see me eat glue???

Meh - i've eaten worse...

 

[island_sands]

The cold spoon would be great but its usually the wire brush and vinegar,:blackeye but even that is still less painful than your leather whip.:chatup:chatup
Uummm burgers, nurse’s, cold spoons and leather whips, it don’t get much better than that.roflroflrofl

MY leather whip?? What about yours? it stings like hell!! rofl rofl

 

[podge]

MY leather whip?? What about yours? it stings like hell!! rofl rofl

That’s right who’s yer daddy :chatup
It’s not the length but you can feel the quality…roflrofl

 

[drunkinbda]

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuughhh im too hungover for this

just wanted to say to erik... i was this close >----< to posting the picard song after you said "make it so".. but would rather just pass out... drunking sucks and i have a freaking halloween weekend to do it in too...

 

[ILDiver]

like this?

That's the place. Heart Attack Grill Diet Center

Not sure they allow you to bring in whips, but after watching some vids of the owner interviewing, he would not care.

 

[Fondueset]

Several things in this thread are almost worthy of my having possibly noticed them.

One is that I cannot believe Island Sands (let alone everyone else) is oblivious to the possibilities of monofins as sex toys. Good grief! You people are talking about whips? How drearily pedestrian..

B: Only Laminar is talking about me!

For god sake, just look at my magnificent butt! I'm fabulous!!

 

[ILDiver]

Fondueset, lets bring in another thread topic into this one (besides the topic of you of course).... Bruce Lee was a GREAT MAN with SO much wisdom! *searches for other buttons*

 

[azapa]

set thread diverter controls for the heart of the sun..

perfect segue opportunity (no, not those two wheeled things):

 

[drunkinbda]

One is that I cannot believe Island Sands (let alone everyone else) is oblivious to the possibilities of monofins as sex toys. Good grief! You people are talking about whips? How drearily pedestrian..

dont forget shoe laces and canned air!

 

[laminar]

Seven degrees of separation. Go!

Complete the 7-steps...

1. Narcissist Freedivers
2. Whip or monofin, honey?
3. Blame Canada
4. "Sir, she's gone from suck to blow!"
5. "Your toys are fun to touch. Mine are all sticky." (for BennyB)
6. Days of wine and vinyl.
7. Lying on a beach, in a black wetsuit, inscrutable secret agent smirk hanging down on one side, martini in hand, speargun ready to discharge at the slightest provocation.

And then up walks the woman known only as Sands. Well, actually Island Sands. But her friend call he George.

"Hello, Ms. Sands, lovely day for a martini, isn't it?"

Just then a giant fist, with thumb and pinky extended along the longitudinal axis floats along behind her and says, "Wakka, wakka, wakka, give me back my sandwich."

As Ms. Sands raises an eyebrow and punctuates it with a flick of her golden locks over one shoulder, a spring of pure warm chocolate bubbles up from a small hole in the sand next to her feet, just above the tide line. It whistles Dixie and blows rings of icing into the air while simultaneously making the sand feel dirty.

A raised 007 eyebrow. "Care for some fondue?"

Ms. Sands, shakes her head with the satisfaction of a housecat with a moth in its jaws and brandishes a cold spoon. A great big cold spoon made of chrome and wood and plastic.

The lines on our hero's forehead deepen and furrow. He looks down the barrel, er, the shaft, um....curve of the spoon.

"End of the line, Monsieur Narcissist. I have you surrounded," Ms. Sands purrs.

"I should be more frightened if you had a whip or a monofin, but I do like the sound of that, so, the answer is yes. Yes, please. Spoon me."

Before the woman they call Island - for after all if no man can be an island it's easy enough for a superlative woman like Sands to step into the role - a small man in a cowboy hat with two six shooters in hand, emerges from the ocean, hissing and bubbling, in the style of the Creature from the Black Lagoon meets Aphrodite.

"I'm drunk or soon to be hungover," snarls the little man, and raises his gun in the direction of Ms. Sands. "So gimme the spoon!"

Is it a double cross of cold spoon war proportions? Should Ms. Sands join our hero to defeat an even greater enemy? Is the natural fondue spring edible or at least dark chocolate?

Find out next time on....The Island of [sorry, we interrupt this broadcast with the results of the US election six days in advance and thanks to our universe destroying time line mucking up friends at the Hadron Collider: Paris Hilton has been added to the Republic ticket by a computer hack of the electronic voting systems and is now in control of the big red button that should absolutely and positively never ever be pushed by anyone except perhaps accidentally by the guy from Dr. Strangelove (ohh, that would have been a hoot, dearie) or a vicious Chihuahua. With Hilton on the ticket, Obamas support swung away like a boom in a sudden backing wind and knocked him out of contention. All hail President Hilton. At least hotels will be better from now on.]

 

[podge]

It’s always a pleasure to have His Highness Fondueset with us.:king
And I’m sorry to slightly change the subjectrofl but you’ve got love a nice piece of cheese whether melted into the form of a freediver or a hard as hell piece of ultra mature Cheddar that’s strong enough to make yer teeth itch.

 

[podge]

Seven degrees of separation. Go!

Complete the 7-steps...

1. Narcissist Freedivers
2. Whip or monofin, honey?
3. Blame Canada
4. "Sir, she's gone from suck to blow!"
5. "Your toys are fun to touch. Mine are all sticky." (for BennyB)
6. Days of wine and vinyl.
7. Lying on a beach, in a black wetsuit, inscrutable Bond smirk hanging down on one side, martini in hand, speargun ready to discharge at the slightest provocation.
And then up walks the woman know only as Island Sands. "Hello, Ms. Sands, lovely day for a martini, isn't it?" Then a giant fist, with thumb and pinky extended floats along behind her and says, "Wakka, wakka, wakka, give me back my sandwich."

A spring of pure warm chocolate bubbles up from a small hole in the sand, just above the tideline. It whistles Dixie and blows rings of icing into the air.

A raised eyebrow. "Care for some fondue?"

Ms. Sands, smirks, brandishes a cold spoon.

"End of the line, Monsieur Narcissist. I have you surrounded."

Before a reply can be made, a small man in a cowboy hat with two six shooters in hand, emerges from the ocean, hissing and bubbling, in the style of the Creature from the Black Lagoon meets Aphrodite. Scary, but strangely stimulating.

"I'm drunk or soon to be hungover," he snarls, and raises his gun in the direction of Ms. Sands.

Is it a double cross? Does Ms. Sands have a greater foe than our hero? Is the natural fondue spring edible or at least dark chocolate?

Find out next time on....The Island of [sorry, we interrupt this broadcast with the results of the US election six days in advance. Paris Hilton has been added to the Republic ticket by a computer hack of the electronic voting systems and is now in control of the big red button that should absolutely and positively never ever be pushed by anyone except perhaps accidentally by the guy from Dr. Strangelove (ohh, that would have been a hoot, dearie) or a vicious Chihuahua. With Hilton on the ticket, Obamas support swung away like a boom in a sudden backing wind and knocked him out of contention. All hail President Hilton. At least hotels will be better from now on.]




name....Island Sands. Does that make me a narcissist? Hell no!

Your turn.

Shit where did that come from, it’s better than my scribbling. Bring on the second chapter???
But I still like cheese…

 

[billieball]

I like cheese, too.

 

[billieball]

Oh, and spoons. And martinis.